Shining Sea Cattery ~ From Our Home To Your Heart

PET RULES

(To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door at nose height.)

Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food.

The other dishes are ours and contain our food.

Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of our plate

and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food

and dish, nor do we find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.

Beating us to the bottom is not the object.

Tripping us doesn't help because we fall faster than you can run.

We cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed.

We are very sorry about this.

Do not think we will continue sleeping on the couch to

ensure your comfort.

Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep.

It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched

out to the fullest extent possible.

We also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues

hanging out the other end to maximize space

is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom.

If by some miracle we beat you there and manage to get the door shut,

it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow or try to turn the knob or get

your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open.

We must exit through the same door we entered.

Also, we have been using the bathroom for years;

hence canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss us, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt.

We cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets,

we have posted the following message on our

FRONT DOOR:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit

& Like to Complain About Our Pets:

1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.

(That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. We like our pets a lot better than we like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To us, he/she is an adopted son/daughter

who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

REMEMBER

Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less.
2. Don't ask for money all the time.
3 Are easier to train.
4. Normally come when called.
5. Never ask to drive the car.
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends.
7. Don't smoke or drink.
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions.
9. Don't want to wear your clothes.
10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college.

11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.